Have you ever met someone who you thought was your friend, and then realized much later that they actually weren’t? You protected them in situations when others tried to point out their negative qualities. You covered for them when they weren’t being their best selves. You helped elevate them when they weren’t capable of elevating themselves. And then, poof! You recognize, too late, they were actually using you all along. Whether it was purposeful or not, it certainly doesn’t feel great.
You see, I believe everyone is put in your life for a reason — you are meant to learn lessons from every relationship, whether it’s successful or failed. People have so many different layers, and what they show others outwardly is not always who they truly are inside. The fascinating thing about people is that they are always changing, evolving, shifting. So you may have met one person, but later you might come to know that same person in a very different way.
If I could go back to school one day, I would study human behavior and psychology. I find it so interesting, and really like the feeling of understanding motivations, thought processes, behaviors, and the inner workings of the human brain.
I’d like to consider myself a pretty good judge of character. When I meet someone new, I am almost instantly aware of whether I will like them or not over the long haul. I used to think I was judgmental, but I think my gut has been spot on in most occasions. When I look for a friend, I find the following qualities to be most attractive:
- A sense of humor
- A moral compass
Do all my friends have every single quality on that list? No. But everyone is different. I like to surround myself with people who make a positive impact on my life in one way or another, and I don’t ever expect anyone to be perfect. But when I see red flags, cracks in character, secretive behavior/repeated dishonesty, or someone who takes credit for things that others do, I am unable to look past it. What I like the least is feeling duped. Or that I put my neck out for someone who could easily throw me under the bus. Etc.
But the good news is this. The healthiest way to handle it is as follows:
Let it go. Keep it moving.
You don’t have time for friends who don’t reciprocate. You don’t need to feel used. Let it go, and keep it moving. Learn a lesson, listen to your gut, see the red flags for what they are, and then you’re on to the next.
Speaking of on to the next, I have been really into breakfast lately. And I mean REALLY into breakfast. I have been craving all the morning time foods, but especially eggs with veggies, and avocado. Here’s a recipe I’ll be incorporating into my meal prep for next week. Give it a try and let me know what you think!
Thanks for reading! Xo.