Well, hello there. I guess you’ve probably gathered by the title of the blog today that something is weighing on me. Have you ever had a relationship (personal or professional) that was simply not transparent or honest? When you look at your own life, are you real? Do your conversations have substance, or are you just a surface communicator?
This week, some things happened that reaffirmed that honesty and transparency are of key importance to my happiness — both in the way I want to be treated, and the way I want to treat others. Without these two traits, everything feels uncertain and stressful. And uncertainty and stress lead me to make poor decisions for my health. Also, what the heck is the point of having relationships where you can’t even trust your pals to tell you that you have a blueberry stuck in your teeth, amiright?! Just be real…
When someone is purposely secretive or misleading, flat out lies, or takes credit for something someone else did, I am immediately triggered. These kinds of things happen often, of course — in corporate America, in friendships, and even in families. It’s sometimes easier to look the other way than to confront these issues head on. But I hold others to a high standard of integrity — one that I try to uphold myself. When I lose trust in a person or an organization, it is difficult to gain back.
I feel like it’s important to have some coping mechanisms for how to stay on track when you’re feeling uncertain, stressed or anxious.
- As you all know by now, one of my main stress relievers is exercise. I love physical activity. Just moving helps me clear my mind, gets those endorphins pumping, regulates my body, and helps me remember to fuel myself with good foods instead of making poor diet decisions. When I have a stressful day at work, I make it a point to get away from my desk (whether it be at lunchtime, when I have a meeting-free afternoon, or after work) and get active for a bit. Climb that hill, farmer carry those kettlebells, do some burpees, run (whatever floats your boat, do it til you feel better)!
- Drink all the water. I know this sounds lame, but I tend to find comfort in the act of eating. So when I’m hydrating myself regularly, I feel less hungry and more satisfied. PS — have you tried Alkaline water yet? I’m kind of obsessed…
- Meal prepping helps. When I’m in search of a snack, knowing that I already have healthy options available is a game-changer. Meal prepping takes all the choice out of it, so instead of grabbing a bag of cheetos in a moment of weakness, I can grab my protein shake (or spaghetti squash and meatballs!) instead.
- Meditate. Step away from any negativity, find a quiet spot (parking garage, empty conference room, your car, take a walk outside, etc.) and take some deep breaths. If you’re not down with real meditation, then just take a minute away and think happy thoughts — soothe yourself.
- When you’re ready, do something. After you’ve calmed down, have a conversation about what happened and how it made you feel. Whether it gets fully resolved, or you just let it out, you’ve made progress. Then, take action to better the situation, or remove yourself from it. Nobody can fault you for that.
The truth is that there will always be personality obstacles, there will always be people who hide, and there will always be things that go on behind the scenes and decisions being made that are beyond your control. But you are in charge of your own integrity level, and ultimately, your own destiny — choose wisely.
Thanks for reading! Xo.